The Other Personal Stuff about Will


4  Jul, 2010

Other sites by this author:
Save Canada’s Last Wild Mustangs

My American Neighbours

The other personal stuff about Will:

EDUCATION: Ba political science (Simon Fraser U. /94); Post-baccalaureate Certificate journalism Langara Polytechnic University /95)

LANGUAGES: English & Spanish (fluent); French ( tourist level ); Italian (barely tourist level : “Dove è il bagno?”)

I was an unhappily adopted child. Total F —-n’ bleeding MISERY. Life in Hell! Marilyn Manson endured an unhappy adoption as a kid. He titled his autobiography: My Life: The Long Hard Road Back From Hell .” BOY, do I identify with THAT!  See this article :Psychological Issues Faced by Adopted Children and Adults.“]

When I bring up in conversation the pain inflicted by my miserable adoption, people generally try to close the conversation down. This is not helpful. As psychologist Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD , writes in her article The Art of Relationships: Understanding The Ghosts of a Traumatic Chidhood: “The first reaction people often have to learning about someone’s traumatic past (or to thinking about their own) is to say they should just leave it in the past where it belongs; in other words, “forget about it…It’s true that the events happened long ago, but the pain continues because the damages that they caused the person were never tended to; so the person’s psyche never healed or healed the wrong way, much like can happen to a broken bone. The main difference is that, unlike with a bone, we can’t physically see a damaged psyche.

Well, life can be hard. But I Got MY Just Desserts: In 1993, after an Adoption Search using all of my own acquired investigative skills as a news reporter,  I located and was happily reunited with my intact, entire birth family. How LUCKY was THAT! In 2009 I finally disowned my adoptive family. I executed a Legal Name Change back to my birth name. Feel much better now.


Boys & girls! Did you know that all that acid …you know… L.S.D.’, … ‘lysergic acid ditheylimide[for all you Gen-X‘ers, Tweeners, Y-Gens, etc. etc. out there] … we dropped all those years ago was actually GOOD for us?? Go read this : Is LSD Good For You? AND check out how : Cary Grant was dropping acid in the 50s !

Heh heh! Do you remember Alice ?

Go ask herI think she’ll know
One pill makes you larger
And one pill makes you small
And the ones that mother gives you
Don’t do anything at all
Go ask Alice
When she’s ten feet tall

And if you go chasing rabbits
And you know you’re going to fall
Tell ’em a hookah smoking caterpillar
Has given you the call
Recall Alice
When she was just small

When men on the chessboard
Get up and tell you where to go
And you’ve just had some kind of mushroom
And your mind is moving low
Go ask Alice
I think she’ll know

When logic and proportion
Have fallen softly dead
And the White Knight is talking backwards
And the Red Queen’s “off with her head!”
Remember what the dormouse said:
“Feed your head
Feed your head
Feed your head

Lyric White Rabbit” /AKA Go Ask Alice by Gracie Slick, of  the rock group Jefferson Airplane.
One of Grace Slick’s earliest songs, written during either late 1965 or early 1966, it includes comparisons of the hallucinatory effects of psychedelic drugs such as Magic Mushrooms with the imagery found in the fantasy works of Lewis Carroll.
Slick has stated that White Rabbit was a response towards parents who asked why their children were taking drugs. According to her, books that parents would read to their children, such as “Alice in Wonderland,” encouraged them to experiment with substances since surreal and colorful imagery was often used.

I live in  Greater Vancouver,  on the Lower Mainland coast of  British Columbia, Canada.  I HATE &  LOATHE our  weather here. Rain, rain, rain, rain, rain, rain, rain, rain, rain. Then some more rain. Then some more rain, just to be sure. ➩ oh, except now that we’ve got climate change happening here big time,  sometimes the weather goes totally freaky! Like for instance, summer-in-the-winter – and vice versa. Not exactly paradise!..


We had the 2010 Big Winter Olympics BLOW-OUT here. [It didn’t snow ! How do you have a winter Olympics with no snow??] As far as I’m concerned, the CLIMAX of the whole big deal was Canadian singer k.d. lang’s awesome performance of the Leonard Cohen song Hallelujah at the Olympics Opening Ceremonies. Here is the closest thing to the professional video you can find on the web so far [excellent audio/video tonal depth – but zoomed-out, wide pan, a bit shakey] : iTunes has the real thing for sale – worth every penny!  If k.d. doesn’t send shivers up and down yer spine, you got no soul, man!

WHERE  I  VACATION :

Mexico. The Mexican Riviera is Paradise on Earth. My secretRiviera‘ destination is beautiful beyond your wildest dreams.Screw hideous, over-priced Cancun, Puerto Vallarta, Mazatlan, etc! They all are so over-rated. I won’t reveal my special ‘Riviera’ hideaway, sorry. Keeping it to myself. But I will later show you lots of photos of this fabulous locale on this blog.

Palms and ‘palapas’

Beachfront open air dining palapa – genuine thatched roof!

Please check back here periodically for more fabulous vacation pics on The Mexican Riviera.

Early morning Poolside

The resort zoom foto from across the bay

Beachside “palapa”

Coming in from another spectacular snorkel session. emerald green waves. Saw Blue Tangs, YellowTangs, urchins, small manta ray

snorkeling on by…

Evr’ybody Got Sumthin’ to Hide ‘Xcept For Me an’ my Minkey!

DAMN Paparrazi!

Ahh…just look at that blue water!

Ferry terminal

Comments
  1. Mary Dyson says:

    Hello Will,
    I had emergency surgery because of a ruptured brain aneurysm (clipped now), almost 11 years ago at Toronto Western Hospital. It was too deep to use the coil. I attempted suicide year 7 post surgery. I too have a Master’s degree and thought I was invincible. I returned to work. Lasted 2 months.
    I am chronically depressed and medicated. I have a whole other array of psycho/emotional/deficits or total fuck ups in my life now. I am a defiant ex-hippie but sometimes don’t care anymore. I gave up a baby for adoption in 1969. I am as Robin Williams once said about us a “woman in comfortable shoes”. I’m married and we’ve been together for 25 years this coming January.
    We raised two daughters. I was an activist in our community in T.O. I was a psychotherapist. I had a life. I wanted it back.
    But I never got it back. Your story hit every one of my experiences and then some. I’m feeling a little stunned as I had stopped looking for help with this. After I was ushered out of the hospital with a pat on the back I figured it was up to me to get on with it, after all I was a professional in the field of psychology. They didn’t seem to think I needed any help so why should I. But with all my education and training I didn’t know how to get support from the guv. I was embarrassed to ask anyone for help.
    My spouse picked up the financial slack as my savings slowly depleted. I’m on CPP now. I’m 63 and I get a whopping $324 and change/month (I worked in the non-profit no money sector). But we are frugal. We have a Casa in Puerto Escondido, Oaxaca. It’s a refuge and retreat and cheap. Our sand isn’t white like Tulum , where I slept on the beach in 1976. (n.b. my pet peeve these days is “the mayan riviera”). The people are wonderful in Puerto and I’m going to be seeing a Curandera this year. We’ll see what healing she can offer me.

    I had just wanted to say thank you for being such a fabulous writer and I got carried away, sorry. Thank you for telling the truth. Thank you for making me feel a little less crazy.

    peace and love. . . a fellow traveler

    • Will says:

      Hey there Mary Dyson,

      So sorry for taking so long to respond to your and others’ comments on my “Nothingyoucansee” site. I move in only one speed: ultra-super-fukked-up-SLOW. Seriously.
      What a story you wrote for me, and my readers. Thanks. You’re a pretty damn great writer yourself. My hubby and I like comfortable shoes. We especially like them when we go to Mexico each Spring. We’ll be there in May this year.

      (Could you possibly help us figure the in’s and outs of snow-birding in Mexico? We’ve been to Akumal so many times, we’re totally in love with the place, and we want to retire to that locale in a few years. **n.b. Akumal ain’t like the rest along the Riviera. It’s old, it’s small, it’s native-style, it’s got THE beach, and it has a gang of foreigners who’ve been going there annually since Before Krist., so it feels like a private club. We pick up with the regulars’ news every Spring. We snorkel, tan, lay around. How did you manage to get your casa in Escondido? Did you just use a “Mexi-realtor?” Or what? What kind of money we talking about? We’ve joined the Canadian Snowbirding Ass’n and are hoping to get good info there. They have a monthly magazine. Any tips you might have will be mucho appreciated)

      Sorry about that detour. When you want something and you know nothing, you just have got to ask anybody/ everybody who might know about your “something.” Sabes?

      Good gawd! I know just what you mean about all the shit that’s hit you. The big education. The big career.The lost career. The lost-practically-every-fukkin-thing in your former life! Some fukkin fun.

      I’m 61, my old man is 60. He retires this year. My brain problems have practically killed him a dozen times over. We’re such a burden, aint we? I always wanted to grow up and become a Burden. Ain’t no joke.

      Hey, ya, I’m on CPPD too. $ One K/mo. It’s no fortune but its one helluva lot collecting from my own contributions to CPP than begging welfare money “alms for the poor” from the fukkin Province of B.C. British Columbia has got to be the meanest, ugliest place ever to try to collect social assistance. You are considered GUILTY (of what? I never did know) until proven otherwise. I never did prove otherwise so they kicked me out, and that’s how I got to CPPD. Bad trip, man.
      Mary, I can especially relate to this: “defiant ex-hippie but sometimes don’t care anymore.” We’re twins of defiance! There is a wild and crazy Sixties movie that deals that illustrates our common ‘ I give up” feeling. You’ve likely seen it, or at least heard of it: “Fritz The Cat.” ?? It came to theatres somewhere in the Sixties fog, billed as “The First X-Rated Animated Feature.” You know?
      If not, do everything possible to see it. It’s available on DVD, but not easy to find, as it became a cult movie. I tracked a used copy down on eBAy. You will be floored by it. Fritz is this dirty, horny, lazy, smarts tomcat living in the inner city, smoking pot, shooting up, balling girl cats, skipping class, etc. etc. He starts to get down with black people. The flick is filled with hilarious porn and nudity. The cops are cartoon PIGS! Hah ha! Anyway, Fritz maybe had some kinda brain injury too, cause he’s like us in every way. He finally gives in to anarchy and goes along with an underground terrorist group who blow up a hydro facility, where he gets fried in the fire. ~fin~
      What is gonna happen to people like us? At least life got considerably better when Justin Trudeau took over. I had a passing acquaintance with his dad, when he was p.m, and now I have a nearly-passing acquaintance with the new Trudeau prime minister. I dig the Trudeaus so much. “Pater noster, omnibus deliberus Trudeausisus in Ottawambius.” I’m a poet too as you can see. Hah I kill me!
      Well, babe, I gotta move on. I have an important afternoon nap to catch. I’m old. I’m nearly done. I’m tired.
      Regards,
      Will T.

      email me: kathouse@shaw.ca

  2. patricemj says:

    I like the comment you made of the “my blog stat is giving me the finger”. I’m glad you’re here on WP telling your story…we need all sides and the group thinker can just F-themselves. peace, patrice

  3. Ashley says:

    Hi Will,

    My name is Ashley and I found your post linking to your blog on the Aneurysm & AVM support page. I’m so incredibly sorry to hear about what you’ve endured and can only begin to imagine how this impacts your life every day.

    My mother suffered from an undetected ruptured aneurysm around 10 years ago when I was in high school. I became her primary caregiver and emotional supporter. The hardest thing, as you say repeatedly, is that nobody—very few people could see her disability. In fact, she herself couldn’t, at least not fully. Her personality had shifted, her moods and responses were unpredictable, and she seemed like an entirely different person. I tried to respond accordingly, but she didn’t understand how she was different and why everyone was treating her like they were walking on eggshells.

    I’m amazed at your ability—perhaps because as a journalist and filmmaker you’re used to documenting subtlety?—to note the changes you’ve experienced.

    I’m currently working on an article for my master’s degree at Columbia and then plan to pitch it to ABC News where I work. I think very few patients and families are prepared for what to expect and how to cope beyond any physical changes. I can’t tell you how much I would like to speak with you about what you’ve experienced, from the inside. It would mean a great deal to me personally, in terms of trying to better understand and support my mother, and in terms of working on an article which can hopefully help survivors and families at a broader level.

    Please be in touch in the next few days if you can. You can reach me at this email.

    Thanks so much; take care. I hope to hear from you soon.

    Best,
    Ashley

  4. marylee says:

    hi will, i’m from the avm/brain anneurysm site…you say lots of heavy duty things..i don’t like thoughts sugar coated..so hats off to you. i’m a brain hemmorhage/avm surgery survivor. isn’t it all just a load of laughs. today, at my incision site..the pain is excruciating..weather related..oh and stress too..i can barely move my head; 9 years post op..my song is…the lunatic is in my head; unlock the door , and throw away the key, there’s someone in my head and it’s not me. take care. thanks for the honesty. marylee arnold page 5 under avm

  5. Hi Will. this is from a fellow BA survivor. I got your email yesterday and today, 12/31/10 I’m looking at your site. “VERY GOOD” I can see that you are doing ok, as far as the ruptured aneaurysm goes, and it looks like you are holding your own.
    This site is my main aneurysm site: http://brain-aneurysm-survivor.blogspot.com/ I’ll put your link on it in just a bit.

    Luck to you
    RT…

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